AUSTIN — Starting in Q3 of this year, Tesla will no longer pay employees in US Dollars and instead pay them in $TSLA, a brand new universal intersubjective work token. Tesla CEO Elon Musk was inspired when he saw Eigenlayer's airdrop announcement and then read the Eigen whitepaper. "It's brilliant, it's cutting edge. It's far too complicated for me to explain it all to you right now, but take it from me and fellow geniuses like Sreeram from Eigen, this right here is the future," said Musk.

Many employees expressed concern that they would no longer be paid in USD, especially those who use dollars on a daily basis. "Don't worry," said Musk, "You don't even need a Coinbase account. All you need to do is download our native Tesla Wallet App and access our exchange. And you won't even need to do that, because these tokens will be non-transferable for the first year. It just doesn't make any sense to make them transferable — people would just sell them, without even understanding the amazing work of genius and engineering that they are selling."

Employees became curious about how they would pay for things like rent and food when they would not be able to transfer or sell the tokens for the first year. "Not to worry," assured Musk. "The universal intersubjective work tokens will allow the users to make consensus-based claims about the nature of our reality in a cryptoeconomically secure way. For example: 'paying your employees in tokens is bullshit' is subjective, because that's just your own opinion. But an intersubjective truth is one that can be shared and observed broadly, such as 'What is the dollar value of a token that can't be transferred or sold?'"

Grab the latest crew badge and sew it directly onto your Degen Scouts sash.

AUSTIN — Starting in Q3 of this year, Tesla will no longer pay employees in US Dollars and instead pay them in $TSLA, a brand new universal intersubjective work token. Tesla CEO Elon Musk was inspired when he saw Eigenlayer's airdrop announcement and then read the Eigen whitepaper. "It's brilliant, it's cutting edge. It's far too complicated for me to explain it all to you right now, but take it from me and fellow geniuses like Sreeram from Eigen, this right here is the future," said Musk.

Many employees expressed concern that they would no longer be paid in USD, especially those who use dollars on a daily basis. "Don't worry," said Musk, "You don't even need a Coinbase account. All you need to do is download our native Tesla Wallet App and access our exchange. And you won't even need to do that, because these tokens will be non-transferable for the first year. It just doesn't make any sense to make them transferable — people would just sell them, without even understanding the amazing work of genius and engineering that they are selling."

Employees became curious about how they would pay for things like rent and food when they would not be able to transfer or sell the tokens for the first year. "Not to worry," assured Musk. "The universal intersubjective work tokens will allow the users to make consensus-based claims about the nature of our reality in a cryptoeconomically secure way. For example: 'paying your employees in tokens is bullshit' is subjective, because that's just your own opinion. But an intersubjective truth is one that can be shared and observed broadly, such as 'What is the dollar value of a token that can't be transferred or sold?'"

Grab the latest crew badge and sew it directly onto your Degen Scouts sash.