# NEWSLETTER — Boomer Parents Now Own More Bitcoin Than Their Kids

> The Rug's Mostly Credible Inbox Fodder #24

**Published by:** [The Rug](https://therugnews.com/)
**Published on:** 2024-03-04
**Categories:** newsletter, news, crypto, satire, comedy, web3, blockchain
**URL:** https://therugnews.com/boomer-parents-now-own-more-bitcoin-than-their-kids-newsletter-24

## Content

Letter From The EditorDear Bull's Eyes, Well the matador market is back! For a while there, bitcoin stalled as suburban moms moved into big dumb cups, but now a weather alert from the coast guard projects boating accidents will reach an ATH in 2024/25 and boomer parents now own more bitcoin than their kids. ETH Denver went off without a hitch because Vitalik limited the number of heads who can crash on his floor to fifty. But with the market's heating up, your friend who just accepted buy now advice from six months ago is flummoxed that he's not rich yet. Plus, SBF is defining modern fashion with his new spring collection, a lot of people got raptured when ETH broke 3K, although now the ETH to 10K crowd might settle for 4K and a hot dog. In other news investigators are still looking for whoever is called Sybil and why she has been attacked. They have a few leads. Giddyup. The Rug | ArticlesPREMIUM — Everyone in Courtroom Was Satoshi EXCEPT For Craig WrightPREMIUM — Craig Wright, who has claimed for years to be Bitcoin’s anonymous creator Satoshi Nakamoto, was dumbfounded recently when the courtroom finally revealed that every person in the room, with the exception of Craig Wright, is actually... [cont. reading] Level up to The Rug Premium and get exclusive access to this and future exclusive monthly articles, a premium member-only NFT badge, and access to a Discord channel with The Rug writers. $2/month, infinity laughs a year. The math checks out. We have a math scientist on staff.Boomer Parents Now Own More Bitcoin Than Their KidsJACKSONVILLE — It just keeps getting better for Boomers in the wake of the wave of recent Bitcoin ETFs. Baby boomer parents are continuing to show that the tortoise beats the hare and are increasingly surpassing their millennial and Gen Z children in terms of Bitcoin ownership, fueled pretty much entirely by the advent of...[cont. reading]Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen Consults Ghost of Ben Franklin for Advice on CryptoWASHINGTON D.C. — Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen communed with the soul of Ben Franklin late Saturday evening for advice on crypto regulation. She reported to be desperate for ideas on how to stop it from... [cont. reading] The Rug | X/Bird HeadlinesSAFETY — Coast Guard Forecasts Record High Boating Accidents in 2024-25 The Rug | Crypto News @TheRugNews SAFETY — Coast Guard Forecasts Record High Boating Accidents in 2024-25 #TheRug 15 7:18 PM • Feb 27, 2024 Coast Guard knows best.MARKETS — Friend Who Just Accepted 'Buy Now' Advice From Six Months Ago Somehow Not Rich Yet The Rug | Crypto News @TheRugNews MARKETS — Friend Who Just Accepted 'Buy Now' Advice From Six Months Ago Somehow Not Rich Yet #TheRug 11 6:27 PM • Feb 28, 2024 How has it not happened yet?MARKETS — ETH Hits 3K, HODLers Raptured While World Burns The Rug | Crypto News @TheRugNews MARKETS — ETH Hits 3K, HODLers Raptured While World Burns #TheRug 15 9:39 PM • Feb 20, 2024 No man shall know the hour. INVESTIGATION — Who Is Sybil And Why Does She Keep Getting Attacked? The Rug | Crypto News @TheRugNews INVESTIGATION — Who Is Sybil And Why Does She Keep Getting Attacked? #TheRug 13 6:05 PM • Feb 19, 2024 Tell me what you do know about her.FINANCE — Bitcoin Stalls as More Suburban Moms Move Net Worth Into Big Dumb Cups The Rug | Crypto News @TheRugNews FINANCE — Bitcoin Stalls as More Suburban Moms Move Net Worth Into Big Dumb Cups #TheRug #Stanley 8 4:55 PM • Feb 7, 2024 They are pretty cool though. Calls to ActionUpgrade to Premium to get ALL the hardest-hitting articles and perksSnag a copy of The Rug | Vol. III Issue 1Follow us on hey.xyz or check us out on WarpcastShare the funny with a friendSubscribers, join our discord and come hang out in the lounge Bonus Content: Discord access and February Rug Crew Badge.Rug Basic and Premium subscribers may enter here. February Rug Crew BadgeGrab the latest crew badge and sew it directly onto your Degen Scouts sash. Collect NFT Join the Discord Get your butt in here... the server. Join here

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