# NEWSLETTER — Boomer Parents Now Own More Bitcoin Than Their Kids *The Rug's Mostly Credible Inbox Fodder #24* By [The Rug](https://therugnews.com) · 2024-03-04 newsletter, news, crypto, satire, comedy, web3, blockchain --- ![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/7d9badf9642efb2fd5d19fa7d561f7c4.jpg) ### Letter From The Editor Dear Bull's Eyes, Well the matador market is back! For a while there, bitcoin stalled as suburban moms moved into [big dumb cups](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1755349587282530691), but now a weather alert from the coast guard projects boating accidents [will reach an ATH](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762633302450610565) in 2024/25 and boomer parents now [own more](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1763699394162082070) bitcoin than their kids. ETH Denver went off without a hitch because Vitalik limited the number of heads who can [crash](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1763035552016986137) on his floor to fifty. But with the market's heating up, your friend who just accepted buy now advice [from six months ago](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762982911698170209) is flummoxed that he's not rich yet. Plus, SBF is defining modern fashion with his new [spring collection](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1760827391122026756), a lot of people got raptured when ETH [broke 3K](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1760132120599478479), although now the ETH to 10K crowd might settle for [4K and a hot dog](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1760459131469881815). In other news [investigators are still looking](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1759715876238930285) for whoever is called Sybil and why she has been attacked. They have a few leads. Giddyup. * * * The Rug | Articles ================== PREMIUM — Everyone in Courtroom Was Satoshi EXCEPT For Craig Wright ------------------------------------------------------------------- ![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/cad05369a8db69c93d5f9d1f0412088d.jpg) PREMIUM — Craig Wright, who has claimed for years to be Bitcoin’s anonymous creator Satoshi Nakamoto, was dumbfounded recently when the courtroom finally revealed that every person in the room, with the exception of Craig Wright, is actually... [\[cont. reading\]](https://paragraph.xyz/@therugnews/everyone-was-satoshi) _Level up to_ **_The Rug Premium_** _and get exclusive access to this and future exclusive monthly articles, a premium member-only NFT badge, and access to a Discord channel with The Rug writers. $2/month, infinity laughs a year. The math checks out. We have a math scientist on staff._ **Boomer Parents Now Own More Bitcoin Than Their Kids** ------------------------------------------------------- ![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/748dc18e78d9b87772202997eccd551c.jpg) JACKSONVILLE — It just keeps getting better for Boomers in the wake of the wave of recent Bitcoin ETFs. Baby boomer parents are continuing to show that the tortoise beats the hare and are increasingly surpassing their millennial and Gen Z children in terms of Bitcoin ownership, fueled pretty much entirely by the advent of...[\[cont. reading\]](https://paragraph.xyz/@therugnews/bitcoin-boomer-parents) **Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen Consults Ghost of Ben Franklin for Advice on Crypto** --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/a65043e259c1ea62a108481ec88c3fb2.jpg) WASHINGTON D.C. — Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen communed with the soul of Ben Franklin late Saturday evening for advice on crypto regulation. She reported to be desperate for ideas on how to stop it from... [\[cont. reading\]](https://paragraph.xyz/@therugnews/treasury-secretary) * * * The Rug | X/Bird Headlines ========================== ### SAFETY — Coast Guard Forecasts Record High Boating Accidents in 2024-25 [![User Avatar](https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1459983921060335621/G7QEOxAZ_normal.jpg)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [The Rug | Crypto News](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [@TheRugNews](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [![Twitter Logo](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/logo.png)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762633302450610565) SAFETY — Coast Guard Forecasts Record High Boating Accidents in 2024-25 [#TheRug](https://twitter.com/hashtag/TheRug) ![](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GHYho1DWkAACL0u.jpg) [![Like Icon](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/heart.png) 15](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762633302450610565)[ 7:18 PM • Feb 27, 2024 ](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762633302450610565) Coast Guard [knows best](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762633302450610565). ### MARKETS — Friend Who Just Accepted 'Buy Now' Advice From Six Months Ago Somehow Not Rich Yet [![User Avatar](https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1459983921060335621/G7QEOxAZ_normal.jpg)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [The Rug | Crypto News](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [@TheRugNews](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [![Twitter Logo](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/logo.png)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762982911698170209) MARKETS — Friend Who Just Accepted 'Buy Now' Advice From Six Months Ago Somehow Not Rich Yet [#TheRug](https://twitter.com/hashtag/TheRug) ![](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GHdcJwKbAAA0lpk.jpg) [![Like Icon](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/heart.png) 11](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762982911698170209)[ 6:27 PM • Feb 28, 2024 ](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762982911698170209) How has it not happened [yet](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1762982911698170209)? ### MARKETS — ETH Hits 3K, HODLers Raptured While World Burns [![User Avatar](https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1459983921060335621/G7QEOxAZ_normal.jpg)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [The Rug | Crypto News](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [@TheRugNews](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [![Twitter Logo](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/logo.png)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1760132120599478479) MARKETS — ETH Hits 3K, HODLers Raptured While World Burns [#TheRug](https://twitter.com/hashtag/TheRug) ![](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GG0-0kubIAAjBb9.jpg) [![Like Icon](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/heart.png) 15](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1760132120599478479)[ 9:39 PM • Feb 20, 2024 ](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1760132120599478479) No man shall know [the hour](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1760132120599478479). ### INVESTIGATION — Who Is Sybil And Why Does She Keep Getting Attacked? [![User Avatar](https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1459983921060335621/G7QEOxAZ_normal.jpg)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [The Rug | Crypto News](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [@TheRugNews](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [![Twitter Logo](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/logo.png)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1759715876238930285) INVESTIGATION — Who Is Sybil And Why Does She Keep Getting Attacked? [#TheRug](https://twitter.com/hashtag/TheRug) ![](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GGvD8UrWQAAUzB7.jpg) [![Like Icon](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/heart.png) 13](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1759715876238930285)[ 6:05 PM • Feb 19, 2024 ](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1759715876238930285) Tell me what you do [know](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1759715876238930285) about her. ### FINANCE — Bitcoin Stalls as More Suburban Moms Move Net Worth Into Big Dumb Cups [![User Avatar](https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1459983921060335621/G7QEOxAZ_normal.jpg)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [The Rug | Crypto News](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [@TheRugNews](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews) [![Twitter Logo](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/logo.png)](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1755349587282530691) FINANCE — Bitcoin Stalls as More Suburban Moms Move Net Worth Into Big Dumb Cups [#TheRug](https://twitter.com/hashtag/TheRug) [#Stanley](https://twitter.com/hashtag/Stanley) ![](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GFxBAMdbYAAAs-Z.jpg) [![Like Icon](https://paragraph.xyz/editor/twitter/heart.png) 8](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1755349587282530691)[ 4:55 PM • Feb 7, 2024 ](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1755349587282530691) They are pretty cool [though](https://twitter.com/TheRugNews/status/1755349587282530691). * * * Calls to Action =============== * Upgrade to Premium to get **ALL** **the hardest-hitting articles and perks** * [Snag a copy](https://therug.mirror.xyz/emz2lnv-7mKqRIp0yxttEHlmplqD_BT-4GeDtthvwDo) of The Rug | Vol. III Issue 1 * [Follow us on hey.xyz](https://lenster.xyz/u/therugofficial) or [check us out on Warpcast](https://warpcast.com/therugnews) * Share the funny with a friend * Subscribers, join our discord and come hang out in the lounge * * * **Bonus Content**: ================== **Discord access and February Rug Crew Badge.** ----------------------------------------------- Rug Basic and Premium subscribers may enter here_._ February Rug Crew Badge ======================= Grab the latest crew badge and sew it directly onto your Degen Scouts sash. ![](https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/npm/emoji-datasource-apple/img/apple/64/269c-fe0f.png) ![](https://highlight-creator-assets.highlight.xyz/main/image/24ba03dd-5287-4133-9fd1-ebacb3d91dd1.png) [Collect NFT](https://mint.highlight.xyz/65d7eda47898067998164dd8) Join the Discord ================ Get your butt in here... the server. ![](https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/npm/emoji-datasource-apple/img/apple/64/1f351.png) [![](https://storage.googleapis.com/papyrus_images/fbf2d43ecb7df6f3c1ed045ce68f2260.png)](https://discord.gg/fzjBFy3ede) [Join here](https://discord.gg/fzjBFy3ede) --- *Originally published on [The Rug](https://therugnews.com/boomer-parents-now-own-more-bitcoin-than-their-kids-newsletter-24)*